A wonderful farewell...

Family & Friends,

Thank you so much to those of you who could join us on Saturday for Dad/Grandpa/Bob's funeral.

It was such a tender and honest memorial to a man who touched so many people's lives.

We met as a family - after the morning viewing - to say our goodbyes. Gene led us in a family prayer which put our hearts at rest.

The meeting was started with a song, sung by a dear friend of Grandpa's, Simon Bolivar. It was soft, yet powerful and set a nice tone for the meeting.

Steven gave the invocation. It was moving to watch him as he signed - his hands gently asking for comfort for the grieving and guidance for the speakers. It would have been apparent what he was saying by the very movements of his hands, face, and body and was confirmed by the words his wife Krista relayed.

Mark spoke next reflecting on the moments from Bob's life that he might want us to remember. Mark was humorous and sweet - and included many traits of Grandpa that had us all laughing and crying. It was tender to see him read his notes, smile with a memory, and then share those thoughts through his own tears and laughter.

Patti followed Mark reflecting on the life that Grandpa led. She touched on three things that she knew he would want remembered: 1) his love for Grandma, 2) his love of family and, 3) his unbelievable work ethic. She was right when she said that Grandpa 'would get as close to people as they would let him'.

The speaker portion of the program paused as we were treated to the amazing talent of Sarah Twiss (Mark's daughter). Playing Grandpa's favorite song, Clair de Lune, she guided our minds to experiences we had with him.

After Sarah we were treated - and I do mean treated - to remarks by Grandpa's younger brother Garth. Garth and Grandpa were the best of friends growing up, a bond that continued through their life. Garth touched on the man he knew, and the gospel that Grandpa cherished.

We sang as a congregation - a song which include the fitting lyrics - 'When such a friend from us departs, We hold forever in our hearts a sweet and hallowed memory'.

Doug, Patti's husband, closed the meeting and prepared us all to let go of Grandpa at his burial.

I am attaching the program for anyone who would like to see it but did not. We do have extra and if you would like a hard copy just let me know by sending an email or commenting below.

Also below is the life story video that was played at Grandpa's viewings. I am also hoping to get a copy of the video that was taken of his funeral so that anyone who is interested can watch it.

Thank you again for all your words, letters, calls, and shows of love. He was truly an amazing man, one who will be missed.

Best,
Shelly

Services

Services in Utah

Friday, November 2nd
Viewing
6:00pm - 8:00pm
At the Walker Sanderson Funeral Home
646 E. 800 N.
Orem, Utah 84097

Saturday, November 3rd
Viewing
12:30pm - 1:40pm
Funeral
2:00pm
At the Timpanogos Park 1st Ward Building
1000 North Main Street
Orem, Utah 84057

Service in California

Saturday, November 10th
Memorial Service
10:00am
At the Glendora Stake Center
2121 East Route 66
Glendora, California 91740

Next Phase of Life

Dear Friends and Family,

At 2:20am Grandma/Dad/Bob, as he said, 'went on to the next phase of his life'.

The funeral will be this weekend - and I will post more details as I can. We will also be calling with information.

Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers.

Setback!!

Dear Family & Friends,

Unfortunately I do not have good news to write today.

At about 3:30am this morning (Friday) Grandpa/Dad/Bob went into respiratory failure again. He did not have a good day on Thursday and Grandma noticed his iratic breathing during the night. He collapsed and they called 9-1-1. Ann and Jeff were with them and helped take care of Grandma as well as taking shifts at the hospital.

He is back in the same hospital as before - in intermediate care. Upon arrival he was intubated and sedated. This is the same intensity of care that he was receiving almost two months ago.

Grandma/Mom/Joyce met with the Doctor this morning. They x-rayed Grandpa and found that his pneumonia is back and worse than before. This has all happened since he left the hospital as his x-rays on Tuesday were clear.

The Doctor wants to wait the weekend out to wait for test results before any decisions are made or any other options are explored.

Patti and Kaye flew up to Utah this morning and will be joined by Mark tomorrow (Saturday).

Given the amount of emotion and energy please contact one of the kids (Gene, Dory, Kaye, Patti, Mark or Steven) with questions rather than Grandma/Mom/Joyce...at least for the time being.

Please keep your thoughts, prayers, meditations with Grandpa/Dad/Bob.
Shelly

He's home!

Grandpa/Bob/Dad is home!

He came home from the hospital today and is doing well. Grandma and Kaye got the house ready and equipped for him to be there. Having Jeff there this week will be an added benefit - and blessing!

This site will be slow in regards to updates until I can show Grandma how to post on her own! Then she might very well surprise you with what she chooses to put up here!

Congrats Grandpa/Bob/Dad on your recovery!

Let Freedom Ring!

It would seem that freedom is lurking for Grandpa/Dad/Bob!

If his recovery continues to go as it has this week, we are looking at a release from rehab NEXT week! We are not sure of an exact date, but the rehab center staff have been quite impressed with Grandpa's progress and feel that he is at a place where he could continue to progress at home.

Isn't it amazing! To think of where we were almost two months ago! We are thrilled with this news.

He would have a home health nurse to help him out on a daily basis at home, and the family who are all pitching in to help out.

Kaye is headed up there this weekend for a few days. Grandma & Grandpa are then really excited because former 'Elder Walker', Jeff (Gene's son), is heading into town to keep them company. Then former 'Sister Mort', Ann (Patti's daughter), will come up for a week or two.

This means that there will be help for both Grandma & Grandpa!

More to come in the next few days!



(Please note: I am trying to update this as best I can with the information I get. If I miss something PLEASE let me know so that I can get it up! I would hate to leave out a visit, a piece of information, or a fun story! Thanks, Shelly)

Rehab!

Grandpa/Bob/Dad was moved into the rehab center this weekend!

He welcomes phone calls and is in his room before 10:00am and then after 4:00pm. He would LOVE to hear from anyone.

Contact Grandma/Joyce to get his room information and phone number.

Dad/Bob Update: From Patti

An excerpt from an email from Patti:

Dad is doing so much better!!! We know that we have witnessed a miracle. Saturday morning, I talked to Dr. Bishop (Dad's Doctor's partner that has cared for Dad a lot) and asked him if this is the miracle of modern medicine. He said ,"Yes, but there has been a lot of faith and prayers along with the medical aspect to bring your Dad to this point."

We talked about 10 minutes and I feel so blessed that Dad could be under the care of such wonderful physicians, nurses, therapists but most of all I'm grateful that Dad has faith and that he has willingly born this burden, knowing all along that he is not alone. The Lord has blessed him dearly and our dear Mom as been such a trooper.

The cards, letters, calls, visits, thoughts and prayers have been very sustaining. Thank you ever so much.

Dad and Mom are blessed with the family coming in from short stays to long stays. It's interesting to see how each family member weaves in their own unique style of love and support. Shell has been very nurturing and Dad said he is going to miss their great visits.

Mark was able to come on Saturday on his way home from Denver. He brought Gene down from the airport and now Gene will be here for the week. Dad is bound to rebound even more with Gene's help on food patrol!! Dad has lost about 14 pounds this last month, plus he was down to start with, so he looks a little skinny!! Dad's feeding tube is out and so there's a new challenge.

The menu is all pureed foods, Dad can handle the fruit and puddings, but he passes on pureed pork chops, turkey etc. It makes me want to gag too!!!

Well folks, I just wanted to record some of our events and didn't mean to get carried away, but luckily you all know me!! It has been a very rich and full week!! I appreciate sharing these highlights with you. We leave for New York in about an hour!! We are looking forward to a wonderful trip. I love you all and appreciate all you do to bless my life and my family.

Most gratefully,
Patti

More to come!

I have so much to share and so much to tell - but so little time! My kids and I came home from Utah today. It was hard to say goodbye to Grandma and Grandpa, but I think I can trust them with Gene (wink, wink)!

More to come in the way of posts as Grandma/Mom/Joyce and Gene report. Plus I have a video and a couple of pictures to upload when I have a chance.

All my best,
Shelly

Off the IVs!

The big news for today is that they have taken Grandpa/Dad/Bob off of all the IV machines. This means that he is in less pain and is managing his pain by asking for medication rather than getting it constantly. This shows how much better he is feeling. It also shows that he is getting stronger since he is now eating rather than getting anything via tubes or IV lines.

I realize that it is hard to believe that he has changed so much - and turned such a corner - when so many of you have seen him at a point where we weren't sure what happened. I have had an amazing time with Grandpa and it has been such a relief to see how he has changed just in the week.

Here he is relaxing with Grandma during a visit:




He still isn't quite ready for a lot of visitors, but where he can talk now it shouldn't be long. He does love getting your cards, emails, and love!

Best,
Shelly

Food snapshot

I thought it was interesting to see what Grandpa/Dad/Bob was having to eat at the hospital. Since they have to monitor how many calories he receives they track not only the food but the intake.

Fascinating stuff - but probably not all that tasty :) Grandpa said that it is all pretty good except for the pureed meats. Yeah, I think we can all imagine that.

(Ok, so I'm not tech savvy enough to figure out how to rotate the picture in blogger - so just tilt your head!)

Celebrate good times - come on!

Oh it is time to celebrate!

Jeff and Ann are home from their missions!

And Grandpa/Dad/Bob had three meals today! He is only having soft foods but he is thrilled to at least have some food.

He continues to make good progress but has moments where he feels like he is not working hard enough. That, of course, isn't true but it is understandable.

There were a couple of great moments today:

(1) He had asked for his trach tube to be 'buttoned-up' so that he could actually practice speaking today, and be able to speak to Ann when she got home. It was fantastic to hear his voice, albeit a little horse and deep, and to see him liven up when he was talking. He got to talk with Ann, bringing tears to everyone in the room and then immediately asked to talk with Grandma. He was more than glad to talk with both.

(2) At one point, while he had his trach tube buttoned, the room had the nurse (Justin), the speech therapist (Melanie), and the respiratory therapist were all in the room with Grandpa and I. The team started talking about his need for a new IV and what they were going to do. They had taken out his PICC line earlier and had trouble establishing a new vein for another line. He had lots of pokes and pricks to prove the trouble. Grandpa started calling Justin mean for all the pokes. The conversation then went like this:

Grandpa: "All you guys want is my blood. I think I should start charging. But there is a two time limit (referring to how many times someone gets to try and find a workable vein)."
Justin: "Well I only tried once. I wasn't trying to be mean."
Grandpa: "You are all being mean, poking me with the needles. I'm going to charge $100 a poke."
Justin: "I'm not the mean one. Melanie's mean. She mentioned the chocolate pudding and
then didn't let you have it."
Melanie: "Hey, I would have given him chocolate pudding but he wasn't ready."
Justin: "Right, but you told him about it and got his hopes up. You're the mean one. I'd have given it to him."
Grandpa: "I'm just going to let you two duke it out and see what I can get out of this."
Melanie: "Well I'll get you chocolate pudding now Bob."
Grandpa: "You're gonna have to do better than that now Melanie."

Everyone starts laughing. Grandpa smiles and tells them that he really wants ice cream so whoever will give him ice cream will be the nice one.

It was hilarious! And such a fun visit.

Just a spoonful...

Well, FOUR spoonfuls actually! Grandpa/Dad/Bob was able to have some actual food today! He had four spoonfuls of vanilla pudding. He said it was delicious! Tomorrow he should be able to have even more.

He was thrilled to hear that Jeff got home from his mission and cannot wait to hear more about his time in the field. He is also anxious to hear how Ann is doing when she comes home from her mission tomorrow.

He was in great spirits when I visited him tonight. I came in and he was busy watching 'House'. I had to laugh because I personally think that show is kind of weird and he too couldn't quite understand it. We had fun reading cards, talking about life, and teasing the nurses!

More good news to come tomorrow I'm sure!

Best.
Shelly

Ice Cream Dreams & Caviar Wishes

Well, ok, he might not be interested in caviar at the moment but Grandpa is sure pursuing his desire for ice cream. He even tried bartering with the nurse - she was trying to check his blood sugar and he said he'd trade for ice cream. He just shook his head at her each time she neared him empty-handed. Since she wasn't going to produce any ice cream for him he resorted to calling her a vampire before he let her draw some blood.

I got to spend a lot of time with Grandpa today - which was wonderful for me. He was excited to hear the news about the family, what the weather was like, and see pictures.

As far as news goes it seems like so much changes in a day, and yet not a lot changes. He stayed the entire day off of the ventilator, relying on only his own breathing for oxygen. The nurse commented that not only was that positive but that his oxygen rate has improved.

He still is having trouble swallowing - hence the hiatus on ice cream - but the speech therapist had him try some new exercises today that might help. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets his wish by the end of the week.

A few of you have asked what his days are like. Here is a quick idea, though nothing is ever set in stone:

Morning:
Visit from Dr. Alward, his pulmonary Doc. Usually around 9:00am or 10:00am.
Visit from the physical and speech therapists. Usually shortly after the Dr.
Visit with Grandma who heads over early in the morning.
Lots of rest.
Morning hygiene rituals like brushing his teeth & a sponge bath

Afternoon:
Visit from the physical and speech therapists.
Visit from Dr. Ron Stoddard (his nephew) who is a physical at UVRMC.
Usually time sitting in the chair vs. laying in bed.
Lots of rest.

Evening:
He's had great afternoon/evening nurses who keep him good company besides doing fantastic medical work.
Visit from family (whoever happens to be in town).
Lots of rest.

The time I spent with him today was the best I've had thus far. I was with him for almost two hours and he did not get tired. Usually I try to chat for 1/2 hour and then leave to let him rest, but today he was ready for some company...even if we didn't talk.

The nurse brought him in an electronic letter pad for him to use to spell out words. It is not as complex as the picture below but it serves a similar function. As he types it shows up on the back of the board so that the visitor can read what is being typed.






He tries to mouth everything he wants to say but it isn't always easy to read it. He still hasn't used the electronic letter pad - but maybe tonight we can work on getting comfortable with it. It might make it easier for him to communicate.


One of the best moments today was when he mentioned that 'out of all of this has come some good'. He then went on to say how much love he feels, especially from his family. He was so proud that all of his kids came to see him, to express their love, and to have time with him. It was neat to have a moment like that with him.

If anyone reading this wants to send a note to him, he'd love it. We read them to him multiple times a day :)


Well I need to run. My boys are about to drive Goosey crazy by asking for the millionth time if they can watch the Annie movie (it's a home movie she made showing Grandma how she made caramel popcorn). I think they are going to think we have a movie star in our presence when she comes home from NY this week!


Best to each of you!
Shelly

Pudding & Progress!!

This weekend has been an incredible one for Bob! He has been out of his bed several times sitting in the chair in his room. The longest he has been able to do it has been about 45 minutes - which is fantastic!

He also spent the majority of the day off of his ventilator. Normally he has an oxygen tube down through is tracheotomy tube, but today his lung function was incredibly improved. All this work made him sure worn out - enough that he asked specifically to have sleeping meds.

Still - it was such a great day for him. Of course, in the non-medical world we could all tell he was doing better because he watched a healthy amount of sports and news! Given that he has not been interested in watching television, this is a good sign that he's getting back to himself.

The chocolate pudding is still calling his name - so he works hard on his throat exercises. Hopefully in the next few days he'll get his wish! Sure makes the rest of us grateful for what we get to eat, drink, and do on a daily basis.

Visitors

Since Grandpa Bob is now in the intermediate care room it means his visiting hours are different. Grandma Joyce would like people to let her know if anyone plans on visiting. He loves having the company but he can really only have people for about 10-15 minutes before he gets tired.

If you are planning on a visit, give Joyce a call to get his room information and let her know about your visit.

Thanks!

Intermediate Care!!

Hi Everyone,

Just wanted to let you know that Grandpa/Dad/Bob has been moved to Intermediate Care. This means that he has made some progress to get out of the ICU!!

My Dad (Paul), and my two kids (Will & Walker) and I arrived last night to spend some time here in Utah. Grandpa/Dad/Bob had a little bit of a rough night and they were worried about his heart. They did some testing though and there are no blood clots and everything looks good.

He has a great nurse on this floor, Justin, who has already (in the short two hours he's been in here) built a nice rapport with Grandpa/Dad/Bob. Justin was called in just to work with Grandpa and one other patient, so we feel good about the care he is getting.

Grandpa is still really hoping for food (esp. chocolate pudding) but he is still not swallowing properly. He continues to work on his exercises as directed by the speech therapist, so hopefully in the next few days he can have something more than ice.

I will update this as there is news!!

Love,
Shelly
(Kaye's daughter, Bob's granddaughter)

Dad/Grandpa Update from Patti

Dear Family and Friends,

Can you tell by the length of time between emails that things have been incredibly busy? It's true, they have. Our cute Dad/Grandpa/Friend is amazing.

Today marks day 23 of ICU!!! He if fighting the good fight for sure. There have been so many times that I've thought that Dad would slip away only to find out that he has more fight and more life to live.

After four days at home, I flew back up to Utah late Thursday. Dad had a tracheotomy on Friday. I sat in the waiting room and cried wondering how he could possibly go through this procedure in his weakened condition. The surgery was scheduled at 10:30AM and occured around 3:00PM that in and of itself gave me more time to get more worked up. However, our cousin Dr. Ron Stoddard came to visit Dad and I was able to talk to him in the hall for about 10 minutes. He assured me that we were all seeing Dad in some form of sedation and that he wasn't really as weak as he appeared. Ron went through the benefits of Dad having this operation which basically boils down to the fact that Dad will be able to be more mobile and that is what can help his lungs.

Ron had previously discussed the procedure with Dad on a couple of occasions and Dad said he wanted to have it done. With that said, Friday, Saturday and Sunday were very rough on Dad as he was healing.He definetly had his aware and participatory moments during that time. The nurse was frustrated late Sunday afternoon with all the visits Dad was having. She told us he can only heal when he is sleeping,resting and not being so stimulated. I peeked in on him sleeping and then left for the airport Sunday night. The nurses are amazing and I know that they have Dad's best interests in mind.

Mark and Nancy, Kaye and Dory came in during the weekend. Kaye reported yesterday( Tuesday)" Dad has the sparkle back in his eyes" enough thatwhen his Doctor came in the room he said to Dad, "Bob you have your sparkle back".

Our family has two missionaries out Jeff (Gene and Joan's son) and Ann. They both get home next week. Dad wants to see them as he does all the grandkids. I know it is hard for everyone to fly out but I am asking that all the grandkids send cards, pictures or letters. One of the rituals we have done is to read his mail to him. Dad thoroughly enjoys this, he'll point to the cards and we read them over and over. I never really realized just how much love is packed in a "thinking of you" or "get well" card.

I'm so proud of our Dad/Grandpa. He is truly amazing and I feel honored to be in his presence. Our dear Mom/Grandma has been strengthened by the Lord in this trial too. She is plugging along and her love and devotion to Grandpa is very sustaining to him. Mom is blessed by the outpouring of love and concern by so many people.

Ann flys in on Wednesday, October 3rd and then we have tickets to fly to SLC on Friday, October 5th for the weekend. We are scheduled to leave for New York from SLC on the 8th. We'll just have to wait and see what's going on with Dad before we proceed with our plans.

Please know of my love and appreciation for each one of you. I'm aware of some of the blessings and challenges that you are receiving and facing at this time, thanks for keeping me updated on what's happening in your lives.

I love each of you and am sustained by your love and concern.

Patti
(Bob's daughter)

The dreaded...

The Doctors have decided that Dad/Grandpa/Bob is strong enough to do the dreaded colonoscopy.

Bob has been a trouper through most of these medical procedures - but this is the one that he has been the most resistant too.

As uncomfortable as it might be, the reality is that this test will hopefully give everyone some answers as to what was going on with Bob to bring him to the hospital in the first place. In case you don't know, he was admitted to the hospital not for the respiratory issues he is now facing, but because he had been unable to keep any food down and had been loosing weight.

The results from this will not be available for at least a week but might provide some needed answers.

Tracheotomy

Today is the day of Grandpa/Dad/Bob's tracheotomy. This will allow Grandpa to start using his mouth and to work on building up his throat muscles. He needs to be able to do this in order to start drinking and eating again.

Patti is at the hospital with Grandma and Grandpa and will stay through the surgery. Dory, Mark, Nancy and Kaye will also be there throughout the weekend.

His Doctors feel that he is strong enough for this surgery and that it will help make a difference for him.